Reply to 30 year old nephew is upset he can't bring dog to my house on Christmas

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think you should hold your ground.

Having said that, I think the best thing to do is to set that rule up front.  The year I got my dog, my brother invited me and my family for Christmas, and extended an invitation to my dog at the same time.  I didn't ask, he literally said "Come visit, and bring the dog, I want to meet him!"

So, I made plans, and then on evening of the 23rd, after the car was packed for the next morning, and my elderly mother was waiting to be picked up, when every kennel was full, and Christmas gifts had been bought on the assumption we were traveling up there (ski gear for my kid's big gift, because he lives by a ski hill, gifts for him and his family that only made sense because I was driving up there), he called and said he'd changed his mind because he was worried his cat would be stressed out.

So, if you've allowed dogs in the past, or if your family member has good reason to believe that you would allow a dog (e.g. you told them "bring the dog!") then the negotiations about dogs need to be part of the initial conversation, and not something you throw out after things are otherwise set.  I have no idea if you did that or not.[/quote]

And never last minute.  We have a story like the PPs.  We were told the night before we left that the dog couldn’t come.  (We’d been bringing her for nearly a decade, so this was a surprise.  It turns out, my step mother treats even her children’s dogs better than she treats me and mine.)

So, I said to my dad. “OK, there’s nothing we can do about it now, since the kennel needs more notice than this.  Which one of us would you prefer we leave home ? Me, son-in-law, or your grandson.“

He replied “pretend you never got this call.”[/quote]

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