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[quote=Skyeblue]OK I'll be the lone voice of dissent here and say I think it's a pretty bad idea, but I also think there's miles of middle ground between "Congratulations!!!" and "Dave we're cutting you off".

I see the red flag here as: 2 young people who planned to attend college close by (great!), getting engaged (hmm), and the whole "we won't get married for a while".

Then what's the rush? Be together, be committed, etc. But this strikes me as one or both (but likely one) wanting some kind of place-holder here. And there's just no such thing, even after everyone's wearing a ring. You still have to work together and be your best selves. Maybe I'm a cynic, but something's off about a couple of college sophomores who want to do this. Other possibility is the sex thing; is someone holding out.

Either way, just talk to your son OP and be prepared to have several conversations about the motivations here. Just because you recognize the seriousness of these decisions doesn't mean your potential future DIL will hate you forever. [/quote]

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