Reply to Should I go to his mother’s funeral?

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Reply to "Should I go to his mother’s funeral?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It sounds like it really depends. I can understand how it's awkward to ask "do you want me to go" to a guy that just lost his mother.

If he gave you the wedding details, including time and place, then that does sound like an invitation. You might, if possible, talk to him and gently sound as if you are making plans to attend, but then ask him if he is OK with that. Basically, start with the assumption that he wants you to attend and then give him the opportunity to react to it. [/quote]

Rarely are we in the position of talking about men's emotional labor, but I think this is a great example.  Do NOT burden this guy who just unexpectedly lost his mother with such an awkward conversation as having to tell a rando internet date not to come to his MOTHER'S funeral.  He doesn't need it.  He'll either barely notice she's there, or he'll be weirded out by it.  Send flowers or offer to take him to dinner.  That's enough.  She doesn't know him, or his mother. [/quote]

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