Reply to If you are very happily married w kids 10+ yrs , tell what you think is the main that makes it work.

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Reply to "If you are very happily married w kids 10+ yrs , tell what you think is the main that makes it work."

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[quote=Anonymous]Happily married for 11 years with 2 kids. We have been fortunate, and a lot of things have just worked in our favor so far. These include good health, temperaments and finances.

The main thing is empathy for us. It is really hard to find both of us angry at the same time. When one person is grumpy, the other one tries everything to ease the burden on the grumpy one. The grumpy person sees the effort, appreciates it and quickly calms down.

Additionally, there are so many areas where we are just a perfect match. One is a morning person, and the other is an evening person. So when the going gets tough with the kids, the morning person takes over in the morning and the evening person in the evening. One person is neat, and the messy spouse loves deep cleaning. So we hardly have clashes on issues related to house chores.

Another thing that has made a lot of a difference is finances. We are squarely middle class. (under 150K annual income), but we live within our means, and when we get really stressed we can afford to spend some money to make our lives easier.

And you can never underscore the fortune of having healthy, bright and well behaved kids. Our kids have lots of food allergies, and we have been able to figure out what works and do a good job of avoiding allergens. Other than that, they are very healthy, very bright, and usually the some of the best behaved in any environment beyond our home(they are fairly stubborn at home). So we don't have to worry about them when they leave the house.

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