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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I actually didn’t read that thread. I have a bias against marrying young because that’s what my parents did and their marriage was a disaster. They outwardly seemed mature enough and they  were in s generations where marrying mid 20s was normal even late. They are still married but say they were too young. The thing about 24 from what I remember is you don’t know what you don’t know and you think you know  so much because you do know a lot, but so much changes in the next few years as you hit 30 and beyond. I don’t  want him to rush through that part of life because of me.  We have similar values and goals but our timelines are different. I do enjoy him.[/quote]

PP here that posted the question.  I still am seeing this as your baggage, not his.  Was the only issue really that your parents too young? I say this because my parents divorced and it wasn’t because they were too young.  On the surface, my mom was a single mother,  my step dad had been divorced (no kids).  But my take away wasn’t that all marriages are doomed if one person already has a child or is divorced.  My takeaway is that you have to value the same things for the big things in life that would be hard for someone to compromise - like married or not, how you live, number of kids, religion, family involvement etc.  You also have to have to both have flexibility and be willing to compromise on the smaller things and recognize there is strength in having differing perspectives.  I believe that’s how you grow.  You have to do the hard work of learning how to communicate - advocating for yourself and showing appreciation for your partner and talking out compromises. And be willing to seek help if you can’t do it on your own but both believe it’s worth the effort even when it’s not easy.  Love alone is not enough.  Some of my parents differences like my mom being a single mom, did not mean she wasn’t worthy of or couldn’t successfully have a relationship with someone of a different background.  It just made all the things that build a strong relationship even more important.

At the end of the day, if you can’t get past it or don’t want to get past it, you should let him go.  It sound like he is looking for a serious relationship and either you aren’t or not with him. It’s not right to string someone along and make them jump thru hoops to convince you that they are worthy or “making an exception”.  
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