Reply to Unfair monetary treatment between me and step-siblings?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Where is your father OP?[/quote]
He died when I was a teenager. [/quote]

I am sorry OP.

I posted earlier about my dad and trips/visiting his 2nd wife's grandkids and not his own.  It is deleted now per my request.

I get that this is about so much more than the money or gifts.  This is about your mom dumping you for a new family after your dad died.

I do suggest that you talk to your mom about how hurt you are when she shares all the amazing things she is doing for his daughters, while you and your kids are treated so differently.  You need to try to communicate that it is not about the material things, but the material things are a concrete, physical example that shows how you feel about your importance to her, and your place in her new life and family.

Be prepared, however, that she will be defensive, very defensive, and that your relationship might not recover.  Or she will dismiss you and blow you off.  That hurts too.

Then, you can decide how to go forward. Perhaps she will see and understand your feelings. Or perhaps you will need to find your family somewhere else, maybe through your husband's parents.

I never got along great with my MIL, but after all I went through with my dad dumping us for his new family, I have really learned to love and appreciate my inlaws for how fair they are to their kids and grandkids, and how consistent and engaged they are.

Your mom might not be the mom you need her to be.  So you can only control you, to accept this, and either move on from that part of your life, or go with the flow.[/quote]

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