Reply to Tween boy with HFA has no desire to socialize with peers

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Nobody is saying that people on the spectrum don't have feelings or emotional connections.

But [b]differences in social relatedness are absolutely the core feature of autism[/b], and this often includes less interest in socializing the way other kids do.

I'm not sure why this is even a matter of debate. [/quote]

No it isn't.  People on the spectrum have deficits in reading nonverbal cues not that they don't want to relate to others socially.

There is less interest in socializing because their deficit is in understanding nonverbal social cues.  If you don't know how to "read" people, it is going to effect your wanting to socialize even if you want to.

ASD is not about having "less social motivation" but that their deficits in nonverbal social cues makes people makes them less able to socialize even if they want to to which most due.  If you have been rebuffed by people, after a while you are going to give up.[/quote]

I think you're engaged in a ton of wishful thinking. Austism is not something that can be "cured" by expressly teaching social skills. Again, this is not to say that people with autism don't have feelings or want friends in some cases. [/quote]

Of course autism can't be cured but social skills can be taught.  If they can master the skills well enough, yeah, they can appear NT if slightly "off".  But yeah, they are still autistic not cured.[/quote]

Why the emphasis on making kids appear normal? That message seems much more harmful than just accepting that kids with autism socialize differently. [/quote]

Not MAKING kids appear normal but perceived as NT by NTs.  I am not making a judgement call here.  Just talking about how effective someone can learn social skills.  Is that better?  [/quote]

Look if you have some formula to magically teach social skills so kids with autism "appear NT", I think you could make a lot of $$. you have a very mildly affected child. Be happy, but don't act like you have answers. [/quote]

Never said I had the answers.  I can only relate my experience just like you relate yours.  Yes, I have a mildly affected child and teaching social skills works for him.[/quote]

But you commandeer every thread like this. OP's child is NOT that way.

His social skills s are goal oriented and task oriented which is typical for autism.

OP I think you will have the most success if you can encourage him to do group activities with a shared interest. It may or may not lead to more.

I was at a housing for disabled people forum and the leader said many clients really made the friendship leap when they started living with peers instead of family. [/quote]

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