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Reply to "Adult Daughter Situation - What Would You Do?"

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[quote=Anonymous]I'd have a little sit down talk with them.  Don't bring up the table again.  But lay it out for them that you are providing free room and board while they get on their feet.  Then lay out a new rent payment plan.  Even if you start at a few hundred dollars a month, they should be able to save money and pay that.  Then start the transfer of other bills over to them to too (like cell phone, car insurance, etc).  It doesn't have to be all at once, but over the next year.

The idea is to still be a soft spot for them to land during a hugely transitional time in their lives, while also encouraging them to WANT to get out on their own.

During this sit down, ask them for ideas on how this living situation can live well for all of you.  They are adults, so allow them to help you problem solve.

Don't use your financial help as a way to attempt to emotionally manipulate them.  That's not a recipe for a healthy long term relationship.  You gave that help because you wanted to, not because your kid's asked for it.  Own that and don't use it against them.[/quote]

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