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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, one situation (table) does not have anything to do with the other (housing).  Separate them out.

The table situation and the associated reaction could have been a knee jerk reaction because your DD had a bad day at work, they might have been on their period, etc.  It happens.

Your issue is around the living situation and how to make a break while maintaining a working relationship.

#1) You need to realize that there will be periods of discomfort to both parties as you walk down this path.  
#2) Discomfort leads to growth.  You sound like a swell DH and Father but it seems to me (and I don't know you from a hill of beans) that you don't like making your DD's uncomfortable (you've made their lives easy, at least it sounds easy to most of us).  By encouraging your girls to move out, perhaps before they are ready, you will be making them uncomfortable.  There needs to be a level of discomfort or pain which will help them to grow.  
#3) You don't mention your DW and what her opinion is.  You probably already know this but it's good for both you and DW to be on the same page and both hold the line on whatever you decide (move out, charge rent, etc).  If DW concedes, then you are the bad guy (3 girls vs 1 guy) and that won't end up well for anyone.
#4) To ensure that you maintain a healthy relationship, keep the lines of communication open.  It doesn't matter if it's good or bad communication, as long as there is a steady cadence.  The moment communication stops is when the relationship deteriorates.  
#5) I like a PP's idea of charging a nominal amount for rent and then placing it in a savings account for them.  This will teach them to budget properly.  You could use those funds to help out with a downpayment on a car, house, etc.  It's up to you as to whether you want to tell them about it or not.  I would bring it up and see if you can both agree to where, what and how to use those dollars.  Don't charge them for food and magically, they will probably show up to more home cooked meals rather than eating out since "rent" will impact their spending money.
#6) Not sure if this is the case but it seems that one DD is your problem (older one probably).  The younger one probably is influenced by the older one.  I wouldn't be surprised if you would be willing to have your younger DD live at home but you wanted your older one to move out.  Whatever the case is, you need to apply a consistent set of rules across both girls.

For whatever it's worth, you do sound like a loving Father and I wish I had a dad like you.  I certainly wouldn't have responded like your DD did and would have been grateful for the huge head start in life you've provided, and are providing, to your girls (your older one probably thinks she hit a triple in life rather than being born on third).

Good luck!

[/quote]

This is ridiculous. The girls are spoiled and entitled and they should move out otherwise it will continue. 
You should never have agreed to it in the first place, OP.[/quote]

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