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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don't understand no sex when sex was fine the year before. Low sex drive women or men? I understand we don't all need or want intimacy like that as much as some people and might desire it more than other people. But, having good sex and then nothing? I say he/she is having an affair and making up BS to cover it. Sudden childhood issues surfacing? Nothing but BS. Ask most people who had this happen, and in most cases there is an affair.[/quote]

It is because often, the sex was not "just fine" the year before.  Some of us keep pain hidden for a long, long time.  Some of us convince ourselves we are fine, when we are not.  And then, sometimes we stop being able to be "fine".  Sheesh, you really need to educate yourself on this issue.  Go talk to a therapist.  Read a book.  You never know when you'll learn that it was your spouse, child, friend who has been through hell, but has been putting on the "I'm fine" face for too long.  I hope you never have to experience that.[/quote]

I have utmost empathy for what you have experienced. And survived. But, if you are hiding all this information from your future spouse/partner and he/she commits to life long journey with you, are you not deceiving them and in fact abusing their trust? They go into it without full information and then you are in fact becoming an abuser? But, they have to again be fully supportive of you and your struggle, even though you failed to mention that major part of intimacy, confidence, and other important needs and values in that marriage are not something you can fulfill? You keeping it hidden from your colleague, boss, casual friend, sure, that is fine and none of their business. You keeping this from your life long partner/spouse is absolutely not ok and is abusive. As people say, two wrongs, don't make a right.[/quote]

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