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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The acceptance rates for Ivy League universities are so low that it is irrational to try to figure out how to be accepted by one. I’m not saying this to be mean; it’s a mathematical fact.

However, two things:

1. There’s nothing special about the Ivy League. It’s a football league at the end of the day. There are dozens of schools just as good as the Ivy League.

2. I know plenty of people who went to Ivy League schools. Some of them are successful and many aren’t. It’s about the same as many other great schools. Your kids will succeed or not based on many other factors than whether they go to an Ivy League school.[/quote]

I definitely agree, which is why I find it exceptional that there are families which send multiple siblings to the Ivy league, despite the low odds.

And again, i am not hung up on Ivy league per se, there are many high caliber schools that I will be happy for my kids to attend and feel they will succeed -- but the ability to get accepted to an Ivy likely means they will get accepted wherever they really want to go.[/quote]

Like the PP said, unless they’re a legacy, first gen college student, significant minority (Native American, for example), it's luck. Sometimes people beat the odds and win the lottery. [b]We congratulate them and think they’re better than applicants who didn’t get in, when really they just won a lottery.[/b][/quote]

Gosh, I hope no one reads this and believes it to be true, because it isn't.

It may seem like a lottery, because you can't figure out why one is chosen over another and they don't tell you.  But the people choosing work incredibly hard to choose one over the other and there are qualitative reasons.  None of it is random.  Not one iota.[/quote]

Op here. This is my feeling. What are we missing?[/quote]

If multiple kids are attending from one family, you might be missing legacy status.  Which parents might or might not advertise or brag about.   Also, you have a better chance at ED. Be prepared to full pay and commit without a financial aid package.

OP— I really respect that you struggled and are trying to make your kids lives easier. It’s what all good parents want.  To do right by their kids.  So, please take this as coming from a place of wanting to provide perspective.  DH and I went to a top 25 college. Not Ivy. We have successful lives.  I don’t think we’ve struggled to much. We’ve worked hard, but not in a two jobs each and aren’t sure if we can pay the rent way.

We have a kid at TJ. So I see how the sausage is made. The time and energy and money people pour into giving a kid a shot at an Ivy is astounding to me.  And that’s a chance. No guarantees at all.  And my kids are not exactly slackers. And in the end, getting in is a crapshoot and the amount of stress these kids are under is awful.  I don’t see a special sauce. It is work and work and work and work. And not just on school work. On becoming a national level contender in something in addition to being the very top of the class. There is a reason most FCPS Hss have had at least one, sometimes multiple, suicides a year.

Plus, if you are DC UMC, you hit a merit aid donut hole. You will get little to no financial aid, and Ivy’s do not do merit aid. And I will not let my kids take on loans for undergrad. They have grad school ahead.  If your kid goes to UVA or WM or VT in STEM and does well, they will get into the same grad school as kids from an Ivy undergrad.   And in many, if not most fields, the terminal degree matters.  No one cares where I went to undergrad. They care where I went to law school.

Aiming for an Ivy is all fine and good.  And if your kid gets in and you can afford it, great. But if they don’t, or there is a lot of debt involved, then do UVA/ WM/ VT and the best grad school possible.  Take out the loans to pay for a degree that increases your earning power to pay the loan back.

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