Reply to Is this a normal personality trait, and/or should I do something about this?

Forum Index » Tweens and Teens

Reply to "Is this a normal personality trait, and/or should I do something about this?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP again, ok, now I've read all the replies.  There have been some really helpful ones and even the snarky ones are helpful. Thank you, PPs.

Going to google "social pragmatic communication" now, and also I am in the same boat as a PP who said that she shares more with one child than the other due to this difference in (personality).

I personally think the behavior is normal for a 13 y.o. [b]and my older kid is just very nuanced on this issue[/b].  I'm not comparing DD to my older kid AS an older kid.  My older kid would not have done this even when she was 8; that's the comparison I'm making.

[/quote]

Your older kid isn't nuanced.  She sees her sibling through not-partocularly-kind glasses.  I think if anything, your older one is kinda closed minded about anyone who approaches the world differently than she, but for reasons unknown you are more comfortable with her approach than the younger one's.

As for "never done this even when she was eight" - I might ask why she cared more about appearances than warning her friend about a minefield.

OP, perhaps projecting here, but I have a SIL that always "says and does the right thing" so that people feel good when she is talking to them and she comes off like a rose.  In contrast, I am deeply kind but sometimes blunt.  I would be the one to tell a friend she needed to brush her teeth before her next meeting (since it would be better to hear "your breath is off" from a dear friend than it would be to come off poorly somewhere important"), or in private, answer a question honestly about her new boyfriend, or say "yes, you should get that freckle checked out".  And I don't gossip about my family to my family.  I would rather be helpful and loving than seem "nice".  If faced with this situation, my SIL would say "Wow, that's great about the new team.  Have fun!"  I would say that, but follow up with a quiet word about the coach's reputation and offer to say more if she wanted.  Forewarned is forearmed. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics