Reply to Dispelling the Myth

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Dispelling the Myth"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]NP. I'm in that demographic: with kid, never married. Does the stigma apply the same if the woman had a child in a long term relationship and chose not to get married? Is it really so much better to have been in a short marriage that failed? My daughter's dad proposed but we really had a hard time getting along and decided we better fix our differences before tying the knot. Well, we never did find peaceful ground and finally split after 5 years.[/quote]

Your situation is different from OP's situation.  While you weren't married, you did live with the father of your child, have to coparent with that person, go through all the disagreements with that person, and then had to decide whether or not to end the relationship while gauging how that would impact your child.  And you're still stuck coparenting with that person after the relationship ends.  You may or may not have had property together.  Some unmarried couples do.

OP hasn't gone through any of that.  And her responses to pp's indicate that she doesn't understand what goes into that kind of relationship, where there's a kid involved between two people.

I'm not saying it's a bad thing.  Just as a divorced person with kid and dating, I just sometimes don't want to deal with people who have no idea what a good number of us went through.  I don't have time to let you make me feel bad about why I can't hang out tonight.  Or about why I don't want to be exclusive after a month.  Or about anything else you should already get.  And there are some divorced people with kids who also don't get it.  I don't have time for them either.[/quote]

As a single mom, why would you assume that she would not understand your need to not hang out. She does not get the relief from a custody agreement.

[/quote]

That is what I am talking about. It is not a single parent thing. It is "I spent so much time these past 2 weeks navigating my ex trying to parent my child, I really don't have the emotional energy to deal with the fact you think I need to clean my toilet bowl, which is the only dirty spot in my apt. Or to negotiate us cooming dinner at my place when I told you 10 times I can't eat onions. I am out of negotiating this week."[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics