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[quote=Anonymous]A lawyer will tell him the same thing.  She doesn't have to move out and you can't force her.  She needs to move in with that BF but obviously, she doesn't want to.  So do the math.  You can leave, with your kids as I did.  Move their beds and stuff and take all the furniture, TVs, dishes, pots and pans,  etc you need with you.  It's all yours.  Then figure the costs of buying all the other stuff you need to furnish the apartment, plus the rent you will be paying on top of the mortgage you will stay be paying for her to live in your house.  Figure the BF will move in about 2 weeks later.  Cut off all the utilities in your name for the end of the first month and let her know she needs to call and put that in her name.

Or...have your attorney draw up an agreement where she moves out and you pay her what it would have cost you, per month, for 12 months (18,24? negotiable) while you wait out the one year separation before the final divorce.  She can set up a nice little love nest with her new BF.  If you know the guy, it's a good idea for you to let him know the deal you are offering her so he can encourage it.  He wants time with her, alone.  He doesn't want anything to do with your kids.

Either way it's going to cost you.  I tried option two first and almost had her convinced before a bunch of her GFs (who later abandoned her) set her straight that it was a bad deal and she should get the house free and clear along with alimony and child support.  She liked how that sounded, so she refused the agreement.

I went and rented a place for my kids and I and started moving as much of their stuff over there as I could without her noticing.  Then one fine morning, I backed up a moving and truck and with a couple friends, loaded up the big stuff.  She woke up to this move in process.

Ultimately, I still paid her to leave.  She should have taken the first deal which was better but chose for both of us to waste money on attorneys, only to end up in the same place.  I told her right in front of both attorneys, the money I offered you in the beginning, just went into the college funds of these two guys so now I have less to offer you.

Don't expect an attorney to to be this aggressive or creative.  Trust me when I say, every minute you spend talking to one, and every minute he spends talking to the other side, and sending their stupid canned letters back and forth, is a total waste of time=your money.  In the end, it will all have no value at all and no judge will give any weight to your endless fights.  But oh how the attorneys love these disputes so they can run up their bills.

You have to take control of this situation.  If you came here for sympathy, OK you got it.  If you came here for answers, you haven't received any good advice beyond, "see an attorney now."

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