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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]As a mother of 10 yo and 7 yo DD’s, this sounds miserable. I am terrified of all of this.[/quote]

No need to worry. You will know when you have these situations usually and in our case that is when we opt out of having a party. In our case it is just about being willing to say to remind our kid of our values and deal with the fall out when we tell her or him we will just do a special family thing instead. If our daughter or son has a meltdown over it we talk it through. Usually they can come to see that they don't want to be jerks and they can they can eventually listen to themselves and hear how obnoxious they sound. They can actually remember what it feels like to be left out and to know you have hurt someone greatly. This is once the meltdown subsides.

We discourage relationships with queen bees and alpha males who act socially aggressively. I don't have them over to my house and to be honest I am not willing to buy them birthday presents and send my kid to their parties. If my kids still choose to associate with these kids at school that's their choice. Childhood is when our kids learn important values and I don't think we should step back completely. If you choose to hang out with brats when you are an adult supporting yourself, it's all you, but we certainly aren't raising a princess or prince. I remember the kids when I was growing up who's parents were wrapped around their fingers. They have grown up tp be losers. You can't put "I was the queen B's favorite sidekick" on your resume. When you get caught by the police smoking pot with the cool kids that record comes up every time a workplace does a criminal record check. Also, what if a targeted kid commits suicide? Your child would have to live for the rest of his life knowing he saw that kid tormented and he did nothing. Yes, that's a drastic example and sometimes kids become depressed and it has nothing to do with peer issues.I want my kids to be the type of kids who care and who look out for others. I want the to want to be part of the SOLUTION not part of the problem. [/quote]

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