Reply to 13 birthday party drama

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I disagree.  I think your daughter needs to know that if there is no way to have the party without making her complicit in the bullying, then the party can't happen now.  You can find other special things to do to celebrate, but you as a mom should not model an acceptance of bullying by spending money on a day when your daughter is complicit.

Your daughter is complicit, even if she is acting from fear or weakness.

You can always have an "end of school party" if things resolve by then.[/quote]

This has been my approach - if there is ever a chance you will hurt a friend, you don’t do it.  I don’t ever want my kind to knowingly be a mean girl.  We rarely had parties for my girls because there was no way to keep the size manageable while not excluding.

She can tell her friends “I have friends from lots of groups and didn’t want to have to exclude anyone or have anyone feel awkward with my other friends so instead of a party I’m taking a special trip with my mom instead.”[/quote]

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