Reply to MIL's 70th birthday - Would it be rude of me...?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
Good point, PP, about it not being about my BIL and SIL.... My MIL is very kind and thoughtful.[b] I realize that I am resentful of BIL and SIL never stepping up to host.[/b] And thanks to another PP who said that this is not the time to make a stand about hosting. All good points. 
[/quote]

[quote=Anonymous]
This seems to be triggering a lot of people. If I had an adopted child, I would love that child as I do any child. The reason I used the term "non-blood relative" was to indicate that I think there is more of a duty on SIL or BIL to care for their mother than on me. I have my mother, who, for me, is more special than my mother-in-law. MIL is still special, but my own mother is more special. [/quote]

Have you considered that maybe BIL and SIL don't host because the dynamic of your husband's origin family means that you, having children, are more of matriarch figure than SIL and BIL are?  This will be hard to articulate but maybe their family dynamic with their aunts/uncles/cousins growing up was always to congregate around the households that were more "family" oriented because of the presence of children.   Perhaps in their eyes MIL/grandma is the main momma bear and you're number #2 momma bear.  [/quote]

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