Reply to DS 13 - Is this a battle worth fighting?

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Reply to "DS 13 - Is this a battle worth fighting?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You need to be the responsible parent. He needs to put on a winter coat in subzero temps. No more discussing the issue. Just tell him. And stick to it.[/quote]

I bet you have a toddler. [/quote]
I bet you allow your kid to rule.[/quote]

Clothes are not a hill to die on. [/quote]
When kids learn to obey their parents, 
no one needs to die on any hill.[/quote]

Children aren't dogs.  They can't be brought to heel by sheer force.  Those attempts often have the opposite effects. I had very harsh parents in that regard, and let me tell you, I didn't respect them or obey them. A veil of obedience (taken from the book "Untangled") was the best they could hope for.

Parenting is about teaching, not sheer dominance.  And thus the "die on the hill" is an appropriate way to approach it.  Some things matter; some don't or matter less.  And, while this is not a matter of style, let's be honest: these kids are walking outside for only a few minutes in most instances. No one is going to freeze to death. I grew up in the midwest, where it is much colder, and I can tell you that I was OFTEN not appropriately bundled unless and until it was dangerously cold (like, warnings that skin will freeze in minutes type of cold). This is not it.

Consequences, where they can be done safely or in the realm of safely, are the best lessons. The kids will be cold in certain temps.  At that point, they'll wear proper clothes.

As for being sick and the kid not caring, you simply make clear that if s/he is sick, then there will be no TV/phone/Computer or anything other than being in bed while recuperating. If that's the chance they want to take, so be it. But, follow through. Again, consequences.

You "obey your parents" types are just . . . wrong.[/quote]

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