Reply to Give me permission to just not visit my dad this Christmas please

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]He is having surgery and he's older.  Older people die with surgery.  Which is more important to you, work parties or your father?[/quote]

How old are you, PP? I'm the same age as OP's dad (did you read her update?) and you're characterizing him as practically in his dotage and at death's door. He's healthy but is having knee surgery due to earlier sports-related injuries--not 90 and in precarious health, facing a risky procedure. OP, on the other hand, sounds overwhelmed and possibly depressed and if she's not healthy in both body and mind, her toddler won't have a fully functioning mom.

OP, I know you're going. But after the holidays you and your therapist have some more focused work to do because you need to learn some new coping skills, work on how to be OK with saying no to things, and look at why you're unhappy with work, your in-laws, your step-family, etc. And you and DH may need a reckoning as a couple where he finds a way to be around much more. I really hope this is a wake-up call for you that you can't continue the grind. And it sounds like there is more than just a bit of "toddler years are hard but you'll be fine!" going on here. You do sound more than just seasonally overwhelmed. Double down on the therapy and figure out why there's so much dissatisfaction, and get DH more on board with helping day to day.[/quote]

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