Reply to Why is dating so hard once you hit 40?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It's really hard out there.  It's hard for my over-40 child-free friends but I think it's worse if you have kids.  I feel like the child-free guys are dating child-free women and the guys with kids are also dating child-free women because the scheduling is easier.  If you have a single mom with partial custody and a single dad with partial custody, you've got to have compatible custody arrangements so you can see each other enough to build a relationship.  (before you can introduce the kids.)  When one partner doesn't have kids, it's easier for them to fit their schedule into the other person's schedule.

Plus at our age, a lot of the guys our age are fine with dating younger women, but the guys who are older than us can seem so... old.  The difference between 40 and 50 can seem like a lot if the 50-year-old hasn't taken care of himself.[/quote]

I am 41, never married, childless. I am not in DC anymore - are you, OP?

I found dating in DC pretty bleak. I limited myself to only guys who didn't have kids, though. Now, the dating market where I am (a southern city) is mostly divorced guys with kids. I actually find I am dating better looking and more charming guys now than I did in my 30s in DC. I dont know if it is because I am willing to date dads now or because I am in a different city or what.

I don't know if maybe guys who have kids prefer women who are childless because it is less complicated? I think some prefer moms, though, maybe so that they will understand or be better with the kids.

I agree with it being very easy to find a hookup and harder to find an LTR. I wait for quite a while to have sex because it does seem a lot of guys arent looking for anything serious.[/quote]

PS. Also I am dating guys who are more like 45-48. I guess maybe I am a little younger than them but not by much. I see a decent number of guys that age NOT wanting women in their thirties. I think it is because they dont want more kids.[/quote]

+1. The majority of divorced dads I know won't date women who want more kids, so they date closer to their own age (40s) so that isn't an issue.[/quote]

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