Reply to Is it weird that I don’t want to change my last name?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I took DH's name. Most of my friends took their husband's name. We are all educated, upper middle class women. Most of my friends from college (Ivy league if you must know) took their husband's name as well. I actually read not long ago that the rising generation of young women are more likely to take the husband's name compared to my particular generation (I am 37). I don't know how true it is. I personally have no strong feelings on the subject because a last name is just a last name, and my maiden name was my father's name, not my mother's, so I wasn't fussed about making a point.

But, and I reiterate this, but, no one really cares. Just do what you want to do. If you are judged then that says much about the person judging you, not you.

[/quote]

It always amazes me when people say "well my last name was my father's name" as if that means something, or makes your name less meaningful. However you got it, your last name was YOUR name. The one you used throughout your whole childhood and through to early/mid adulthood (depending on how old you were when you got married).

If you wanted to change your name because you didn't like it, or your father deeply hurt you and you wanted to cut all symbolic ties with your father for some reason, then just say that. But don't act like your name wasn't that important because it happened to be the name your father has/had. That just sounds ridiculous.

And actually, despite "not wanting to make a point", you did make a point. You were the one who actually took action and changed your own name from what it always was to your husband's name. That says a lot more about you than you seem to think. I think it's the women who keep their own name after getting married who aren't making a point.[/quote]

I never got the "it was your father's name" thing, either.  Why is a man's last name his own (even though he got it from his father) but a woman's last name isn't?  My last name is MY last name, I've had it since I was born.  It's as much my name as my husband's name is his name.  And I didn't see a single reason to change MY name when I got married.  It wouldn't make me more married, or more a family.  It would be more effort to change it than not to.  It has caused zero problems even having kids with a different last name (I am the poster whose husband wanted to give the kids his last name, so I got to choose their first and middle names.)  [/quote]

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