Reply to Teach me how to not be jealous

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, although we're not living paycheck to paycheck in a tiny apartment, like you, I feel stuck in a middle-class rut.  My DH doesn't seem to mind his 9-5 grind and I don't hate my job, but I want much more.

Unlike you, I don't have friends that have married into multi-millionaire status, but yeah, I covet the lifestyles of instagrammers that have their weekend homes and the neighbors behind us that just purchased the Tesla P100D.

The fact is we don't know what's going in behind closed 
doors or in their minds or hearts, or bodies for that matter. Diseases don't discriminate (ask Steve Jobs' wife) and people that marry into that lifestyle have even less control over their futures than you do.

I agree with other PPs that suggest channeling your angst into bettering yourself - get a better job, earn more money, start a side hustle, a webpage.  I think taking steps to better your life will bring you much more satisfaction in the long term than wishing you had married "up." [/quote]

Op here. I want to do well and live well. I’ve always wanted this. I am not opposed to working hard on my career however I am also cognizant of the fact that unless I luck into creating a multimillion dollar company, it takes two to build that dream. My DH works hard but isn’t a man of vision. His dream is to come home and play video games and decompress. He’s not thinking investment portfolios or real estate dreams.

I so wish I had a man who was a partner and a co-visionary. Someone who’s dreams is assist and help implement. I’m all on my own and being forced to live the grunt of a thanklesss middle class life. [/quote]

PP here, and my DH isn't either, unfortunately.  He's good for bouncing technology ideas off though.  Does your DH have any special knowledge or skills for which you can at least seek advice, if needed?

Alternatively, the fact of the matter is that people do outgrow each other.  If you think you're better off without him, then nothing wrong in going your own way.  Good luck! [/quote]

My DH isn’t lazy or anything like that. He works very hard at his job, pleases the management at his company and his plan is to keep doing well until they promote him. [b]To me it seems like the opposite of being proactive about your goals and career. [/b]

His attitude gives me anxiety. There’s so much more than this day to day grind of middle class life.

I keep thinking of Creative entrepreneurship ideas on my own to try and pursue. All of my friends who married welll were very ambitious women. They just channeled it to finding a certain kind of guy and are now helping their DHs succeed in their careers.[/quote]

Please explain this to me. How is this the opposite of being proactive? He has a plan, and that plan is to do well enough in his job until he's promoted. That is called working to advance your career. Not everyone can suddenly create a multimillion dollar company or become a booming real estate magnate. I think you're the one with the big issue here. There is nothing preventing you from still doing "ambitious" things despite the "grind of middle class life." But I think you need to start by realizing that what you have isn't bad or holding you back in any way.[/quote]

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