Reply to DH's 1950s-era women friends

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, to summarize: these friends email you to invite you and your DH to something. Neither of you respond to the invite. The friends are, very reasonably, annoyed that nobody responded. To me there's nothing 1950s about this--you (both) just failed to respond to their invitation!

There doesn't seem to be any reason to think that your DH would be better about responding if he got the invites initially (rather than you forwarding them)--right? So that issue is a red herring. In any case, it's not really somebody else's responsibility to remember which person in a couple is "point person" for responding to invites. It's reasonable to treat an invite to either person as having been received by the couple.

If, as you say, you feel like "Oh well" about missing their events, then maybe that means you are ready to ditch these friends. If so, then OK, you don't really have a problem here.

But if not, then you and your DH need to figure out a way to successfully respond to invitations. That's basic etiquette.

If your plan is to forward the invites to your DH and then he forgets to respond, then that doesn't seem like a good plan if you want to keep these friendships. I'd be annoyed with your DH if I were you, but I'd probably take over responding to invites and give him another household assignment that he will actually do instead.

Getting mad at the friends doesn't accomplish anything other than perhaps making you feel better about the slow death of those friendships. [/quote]

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