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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Threads like this make me think of a blog post I once read about a woman who was really fit and had a good body, but had lost a significant amount of weight to get there and had to work hard to maintain it. She wrote about what it was like to date, because these guys loved how fit she was, but wanted to pretend that the reality of maintaining it didn't exist. They didn't want her getting up early on a Saturday to go to spin class and then have a low-calorie, high-protein breakfast at home, they wanted her to sleep in and then go out for french toast for brunch, never mind that she couldn't maintain the body if she went along with that lifestyle. It sounded miserable to me.

I guess what this gets at is, OP, be who you are and who you want to be. If you want to lose weight and get in shape for yourself, do it regardless of dating and let dating fit that lifestyle you want for yourself. If you're content where you are right now, don't make changes just for dating. Present your honest self, and then find people who like and respect that honest self. It's so much easier and enjoyable.[/quote]

And to add my own personal experience, when I met my husband I could have stood to lose 20 pounds. And that was in my early 20s when everyone was tight bodies with no sagging boobs or stretch marks, not on a middle aged body where you have to expect that pregnancy and time will have taken a toll on even the fittest people. I'm sure there were guys who passed me over because of my weight, but I don't really care about that because I met someone amazing. I later lost the 20 pounds and a bit more, and was pretty hot, if I do say so myself. Then I went back to school and gained back that weight and a bit more. And then lost of most of it. And then I had post-partum thyroid issues after both of my pregnancies, and gained a ton of weight, which I'm currently working on losing. I doubt I'll ever get back to having a great body, but that's okay. I have someone who has loved, valued and respected me through all of it, who has never been less than highly enthusiastic about having sex with me, who I'm sure preferred my body when I was thin but never made me feel lesser than I wasn't. Perhaps it all would have worked out the same if I'd been those 20+ pounds lighter before I met him, but I will say that there's a lot of comfort in knowing your significant other isn't going to lose interest or reject you because you've put on some weight. I don't consider that extra weight when I was dating to have hurt me in the least.[/quote]

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