Reply to 360-lb family member... No plans to lose weight. Odds of heart attack?

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Reply to "360-lb family member... No plans to lose weight. Odds of heart attack?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You can look up the odds of a heart attack yourself, I'm sure.  Your post frankly sounds a little condescending (his parents will be so sad!), and the fact that you have begged him to change his habits to no avail means it's time to butt out.

See if you can work on your ability to accept and love your family members the way they are. It can be devastating to fat people to know that they are being monitored and judged continually by those who are supposed to love them unconditionally.[/quote]

I love my family members and want them to be with our family for as long as possible. How is that condescending or judgmental? [/quote]

You think he is a fat, angry loser (no job and lives with parents) and you wonder why I think you're judgemental? You are begging him in person to lose weight and then act disappointed when he doesn't oblige you. It's incredibly condescending to think that someone needs to run their lives in a way that accommodates YOUR feelings (I love him and want him here!). Give me some statistics so I can try to frighten him into changing for me! I will use his parents to try to guilt him into changing for me! 
ME ME ME!

It's NOT ABOUT YOU. He is an adult and you do not get to tell him how to live. If you love him, you will stop badgering him and shut the hell up. Doesn't he have enough problems without having to manage your needs, too?[/quote]

Wow.[/quote]

The PP is correct. I'm the pp with the heavy husband (the second pp with the heavy husband). I hear the things people say to him. I used to say things like that myself, but he opened my eyes to how unhelpful that shit is. People say things to him on the street, family members offer unsolicited opinions and advice. [b]HE KNOWS HE'S HEAVY. He would like not to be! [/b]He really doesn't need to hear people expressing their opinions on his body, even when they do so out of love.[/quote]

So, two questions:

1) why did he let this happen to himself?

2) what is he doing about it?

[/quote]

And one for you: Why is it any of your business?[/quote]

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