Reply to Passive-aggression on the west coast vs outright "aggression" on the east coast

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]East coaster that worked on the west coast for a min. 
It made me so much more aggressive and confrontational. I literally wanted to punch everyone in the face. 
But yoga also makes me angry. 
So...yeah.[/quote]

This is what I'm worried about.  I recently moved to the Pacific NW and, while i've lived in LA also, people here seem to be be west coast passive aggression x10.  Everyone just seems so... easily offended and downright crazy to me.  Like something that would be NBD on the east coast becomes a huge deal here.  I have a friend who lives in Seattle and she was telling me how, if her cart happens to be in the way of how someone is walking (as in, not blocking the aisle, just on her side of the aisle that they are walking through) instead of going around, they will stop and literally stare at her, like glaring at her, waiting for her to move for them.  Having been here, I can totally imagine that.  It's a very weird set of social codes that, to me, seems to be built on a bedrock of wanting to feel angry/aggrieved.  And... it's working on me! I feel annoyed and upset every time I leave my apartment, which is not a problem I've ever had before.  And, of course, I'm a very upfront person, so my instinct is to address it, but any Pacific NWer that I have seen have someone ask about their passive aggression... just denies that this kind of environment exists.  It's just "I think everyone is super pleasant"- so you are made out to be crazy.

Sorry, I didn't mean to rant.  But it worries me because I can feel it make me more of a miserable, confrontational person because of the constant passive aggression over things that are truly so irrelevant and minor.  And I worry that I made a huge mistake moving here.[/quote]

At first I was going to say your friend was lying as I cannot imagine any actual person standing in the middle of the aisle staring at another person instead of walking around.

And then the west coaster chimed in saying your friend was the rude one, proving that I guess that actually is considered normal behavior for some.

All I can say is wow. [/quote]

This is so funny. I'm giggling. It must be a "cultural cart difference." I'm near San Francisco and [b]if my cart were in the way and I got that look, I'd apologize and move it because it would be considered rude.[/b] Most stores have small aisles and tiny carts, so when space is tight it's important to be aware of where you are and how you're impacting those around you. I'd just say excuse me and thank them for moving rather than staring, but if you're in my way, you should move. Even when you go to a more spacious store with wide aisles, most of us are used to following the norms of shopping in small stores, because they're more common.

Another thing I noticed on a grocery store vent thread on dcum is that when we check out here (not sure if it's the entire west coast or just the Bay Area), [b]we put the divider bar on the belt after we put up our groceries.[/b] Almost everyone does it. Not sure if it's expected to the point that I'd call it a cultural norm, but it's really common. I saw a thread once complaining that someone expected them to put the divider down after their items were loaded onto the belt and everyone chimed in that the person behind them was entitled. Maybe they were from the west coast  :lol:

That said, there are rude assholes all across our great land, and I'm not sure which coast has the most. They're probably equally bad in their own ways. [/quote]

100%agree w this poster. Also never noticed any rudeness w pacific NW.

First 20 yrs of my life in BC Canada, second 20 yrs in DC. Gladly in NorCal now.[/quote]

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