Reply to MIL - I am not inclined to respond, but ideas welcome

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I really don't understand what was wrong with the email. Is there more to the story, OP?[/quote]

This.  How is it too little too late when the kids are just in middle school?!

[/quote]
Well, what took them so long?

I don't do fair weather friends, and I don't do people who could have played an important role in my children's life since day one, but who didn't, and suddenly want ME to make a huge effort years later. You had your chance from day one. Where were you then?[/quote]

Are you the OP, or another insane person? There is nothing wrong with MIL. She had her reasons for not being there before, and now she wants to be more present (supposedly). Who cares? It doesn't give OP more work, nor her children. She can come, or not, it won't really change their lives.
It's astonishing the number of judgemental people who want to apply strict standards to others but would go off the deep end if they were applied to them :-)[/quote]
Um, no. If I had been absent in someone's life and then showed sudden onterest, I wouldn't be surprised if they WEREN'T interested. Why should they be?[/quote]

Again, are you OP?

Are you telling us MIL never showed interest? Has she never brought them presents, for their birthdays or other occasions? Have you never sat down to dinner all together? Has she never visited? Never talked to the your children? If she has done these things, she has shown interest. Being present for their musical performances is just another way of showing interest (and I don't blame her for not coming to the earlier ones, unless your children are particularly gifted and perform in something other than the usual school things).

You are either a troll or particularly hateful. Some of us had grandparents who never showed up to anything, and if they had suddenly wanted to to, we would have said yes, of course. [/quote]
I'm
Not OP once a troll. This is just my opinion. I don't allow people to pick and chose, go in and out of my life, and I sure wouldn't expose this type of behavior to my children.

This grandma can slowly show us that she will show up and take interest in my children. But it's on her to do the leg work. I agree with sending the sports schedule and letting her come, but [b]I won't beg, or remind. It's on HER to be there. [/b]

Maybe you've never had people who "suddenly" decide they want to be around you - until something better comes along. Maybe this grandma is genuine. But I won't set up my kids for that kind of disappointment. [/quote]

You're right not to beg or remind...but I don't think anyone said otherwise! I think we are nearly all...dare I say it...in agreement? ;) Give the schedule, let husband handle follow-up, and let it be a pleasant surprise if she shows up. Certainly don't be like "Hey kids, guess what! Grandma Larlington is gonna come to all your events now yay!"[/quote]

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