Reply to Need advice: DD's interaction with the school's resource officer today

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Your daughter has good instincts to tell you about it.  I would compliment her on her instincts.  When kids say something was 'weird' they can be on to something that is 'wrong' but they don't know how to say it yet.

I would want to know why he needed to know her name and why he said 'hands up' to her.  The earlier poster's suggestion asking the question of the teacher is a good one.  We don't know the make up of the school, but I'm assuming it is majority white that he would find a hispanic girl and single her out (I agree with the PP who noted that even that part is odd).

I would tell my daughter that her instincts are correct and, even if it is flirting, it's not appropriate.  It could be that he wasn't racial harassing her but is flirting with her (either way, your daughter is correct in giving voice to her instincts).  Letting the resource officer know (indirectly) that you know what he did could get him to back off your daughter and not pay her extra attention.

Too often we tell kids to override their instincts when they meet someone and just play along or be nice.  Your daughter did the right thing in saying something and you obviously have a good relationship that she wanted to share it with you.  [/quote]

Why do you assume the girl is Hispanic?  The OP said her daughter was a minority, but did not specify which one.  Surely other minorities might take a Spanish class.  For that matter, we don't know that the officer was white.  Although with the OP's declaration of her daughter's minority status, that seems a more logical conclusion to draw.

As for the daughter's instincts, they seem to be telling her it's no big deal.  It seems that by the mother escalating this, she's overriding the child's instincts.

From the original description, I don't see anything "racial" in the interaction.  He was speaking Spanish to a student in a Spanish class.  If he'd spoken Spanish to a Hispanic girl in a French class, then that would be more suspect.

I certainly don't see "flirting".  "Hands up" is neither sexual nor romantic.  Other than it being a male talking to a female,  I can't imagine what sparked that allegation.  If a police officer was going to do something as inappropriate as flirt with a high school student, do you really thing he'd do it in front of a teacher and a classroom of kids?[/quote]

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