Reply to Divorcees - any red flags from the beginning?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I find this to be a really interesting thread. I was like an observer of a couple getting married and saw the red flags for both of them but neither of them saw the red flags. I didn't say anything cause didn't feel like it was my job. He was nuts, gorgeous but nuts, anxious, bad with money, semi-abusive to his child from 1st marriage, 2nd marriage lasted &lt; 1yr. This was his third. Her, lazy, able to work but hadn't worked in 5yrs when they married. Child from previous marriage. Had never taken care of herself or her child move from house to house of relatives and finally into his after marriage.

Whole thing imploded 6 months later, both devastated and blamed the other for issues and marriage failure. Felt like I was watching a slow motion train crash. Red flags are there it is just if people are willing to acknowledge and address[/quote]

This. When people say there were no red flags, I believe that's true in their mind. I always agree with them that I never saw it coming, either, because why would you throw salt on a wound? That's just mean.

However, when our best friends divorced, let me tell you, we saw it coming even before the wedding! We even discussed it while getting ready for their wedding at the hotel.

People say "Oh! You just say that you could see the red flags to believe that it couldn't happen to you..." Or, "Anything can be a red flag in hindsight" but if that were true, there wouldn't be complete fields of study and professions dedicated to predicting human behavior.[/quote]

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