Reply to DH and I constantly fighting over child care

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Reply to "DH and I constantly fighting over child care - how do you do it?"

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I'm a little surprised at the tone of the responses, some of which seem to be bordering on hysterical. The truth is that everyone has some sort of arrangement with their spouse about who does what and when regarding all the details of family life (childcare, kiddie activities, school pickup/dropoff, grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning.) Many of us are pretty informal about it, but almost every family I know has a deal where each parent gets to sleep in a bit for one day each weekend. (I don't have this but don't really mind.)

hat said, your arrangement does sound pretty rigid, and I don't quite get why both parents are treating what presumably a much-wanted child as a hot potato to be tossed to the next person as quickly as possible. And your posts aren't exactly saturated with love for your child (although I'm figuring that's not deliberate.) But my opinions about your parenting arrangements don't really matter. What matters is that YOU aren't happy with this block-scheduling of the parental responsibilities. So you need to figure out a new way to handle things together with your husband.

I can't give you a magic formula. Every family I've ever met does things a little differently based on their temperment, activities, income, living situation, and so on and so on. And lots of us women (even those of us who work outside the home) take on the larger share of the parental load than is strictly fair if you approach things on a tit-for-tat basis. So there may not be a perfect arrangement, but there should be something that is perfect for you. Here's where both you and your husband start, though - with what is best for your child. Everything else, including his biking and social events and your alone time, comes second to that. That's the responsibility of being a parent.[/quote]

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