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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP back. Thank you everyone so much for your posts (most of them) I really do appreciate it and honestly will make an appointment with a therapist sometime this week[/quote]

OP, I have been where you are in terms of coming out of an emotionally abusive relationship and wanting to get some kind of apology.

The thing is that an abuser is by definition not someone who is thinking rationally or operating in a normal, emotionally healthy way.

[b]What you want -- an apology for bad behavior -- is reasonable.  Unfortunately, it is not a reasonable expectation to get an apology from an abuser/emotionally unhealthy person.  You are not going to get an explanation from an abusive/emotionally unhealthy person, no matter how mad you get and no matter how many times you try to him that what he did was wrong and you deserve an apology.  You are expecting rational/healthy behavior from someone who is not rational/healthy.  
[/b]
I'm glad you are going to see a therapist.  You definitely need some help setting boundaries, so you don't get in this situation again.  You need to explore why you didn't recognize and walk away from early signs of abuse.  You need to explore why it is so important for you to get an apology?  Have you somehow bought into the common tactic of the abuser who blames the partner for the abuse.  Have you been subject to gas lighting for so long you have lost your frame of reference for what is real and normal?  What romantic myths are you buying into that caused you to accept this relationship for so long?  (Love is "hard".  True love is "dramatic".  I have to give someone I love another chance.  He says he loves me, even though he does these mean things.)    Why would you want to be friends with someone who was abusive to you?  Why would you want to stay in contact with someone who is abusive?

Find a therapist that is experienced with domestic abuse, block your Ex, and start to heal yourself.

Commit to not dating for at least a year or two. 
[/quote]

Thank you PP!! I screenshotted this to read over again later and remind myself. This is the kind of advice I am looking for.[/quote]

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