Reply to Trying to understand Nicola Peltz Beckham

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think when a man gets married he generally tends to side with his wife's side. My ds is not even married, his girlfriend is lovely but I see it already. Her side is favored. We're easy going people so it's fine, but I imagine if I were more of a dramatic, diva person who liked things my way, there'd be major clashing over things, little slights can become mountains and resentment accumulates. Now throw in billionaire tantrums and expectations, immaturity, social media and public interest and it's a perfect storm for a huge mess of a situation.[/quote]

Is her side favored or is she the one who does all the planning for gifts, visits, phone calls, etc. [/quote]

+1.  Many men hate talking, planning, etc.   And they are so conflict avoidant they would rather not raise something to their mom and skip a visit altogether than have an actual conversation about an issue (which may not even be a huge issue- something like "Hey DW is allergic to your dog and can't stay overnight there unless you board the dog.")[/quote]

It's not like either of them are working. They aren't like you, living paycheck to paycheck. They have nothing else to do but hang out with their parents who foot all the bills. [/quote]

Who are you replying to and what are you even talking about?[/quote]

Who are you? Are you suggesting these two unemployed layabouts favored one side over the other because of all the work that goes into maintaining a relationship? As if they are too busy?[/quote]

I think someone made an OT post about DILs generally favoring their own families and others chimed in saying it may look like that but the sons have agency too.  I don't think anyone has compared their financial situation to the Peltz Beckhams.[/quote]

I think the favoring almost always happens tbh. I can't think of anyone I know who is closer to the dh's family than the dw's, but many have totally fine and good relationships with the dh's family, just not quite as close. Here it's trickier because she seems particularly close to her parents, and the Beckhams are likely used to doing things their very specific way due to wealth and fame. So I can see them asking their son to do x, y or z and the wife disagreeing. And because her family is even wealthier than the Beckhams, there is no pulling strings or guilting their son or else he'll be cut off since he doesn't need them financially. Had he married a poor girl, the dynamics I think would be very different.[/quote]

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