Reply to 17 Year Old Custody Schedule

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous] She talks about everyone and everything being more important than dad as the reason to not have visits.[/quote]

For a teenager in senior year of high school? [b]Sports, social events, and school activities do take precedence over spending time with family, for most teenagers[/b]. At least, that is completely developmentally normal. Parents who don't realize this and refuse to change their lifestyle if they live far from their 17 year olds are setting themselves up to alienate their teen. This was not OP's doing; it was dad's refusal to be flexible and work with his teen. Fair enough - that was Dad's decision, and he has to live with the consequences of not putting his kid's perfectly normal developmental needs first.[/quote]

+1.  In what dual parent household is a 17.5yr old sitting at home with his parents on the weekend?[/quote]

This isn't comparable to a dual-parent household and Dad has 2 weekends/4 days a month.  However, it's over.  The child is 18 and Mom accomplished what she wanted by severing the relationship and now playing victim to why the child doesn't want to see Dad.  Child doesn't value the relationship as Mom taught him that Sports, social events, and school activities take precedence over seeing Dad.   Soon she'll come on here complaining Dad will not pay for college, give her child support or extra's as why should he when they have no relationship anymore.  [/quote]

The parents made the decision to divorce.  Why does the child’s social life and desires have to take second place to his dads wishes.  Mom said dad could be involved and come to events but he choose not to.  He wanted the relationship on his terms.  There was nothing stopping dad from being with his son, inviting his sons friends over to hang out at dads house, showing up for football games—all the things a parent of a teen does.  You don’t demand that a teen spent time with you and only you.  It only build resentment which it looks like happened.[/quote]

Dad has four days a month with this kid.  That's it.  There is plenty of time for a social life, and many other things in the 26 other days we're not with Dad and we don't know Dad's side of the story.  How would you feel if you get a few days a month with your child and are refused as the social life is more important.  Mom set this up, just like you set it up with your children's father.  Then, you turn around and complain Dad isn't involved or doesn't want to pay anything over child support and why should he when he's not a part of the child's life because of your choosing.

Ever wonder why your kids don't want to spend time with you?  Or, why they'd prefer to be with their friends over you?[/quote]

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