Reply to Do you think we will see a massive uptick in women choosing to stay home after this?

Forum Index » General Parenting Discussion

Reply to "Do you think we will see a massive uptick in women choosing to stay home after this?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have never met a SAHM who cares if anyone else works or not. The number of WOHMs here, however, that invent weird narratives about SAHMs who live pitiful existences and are miserably married is truly remarkable. No one accused you of anything, but the hostile attacks on SAHMs reeks of mom guilt. [/quote]

+1. I see nastiness on both sides, but the vitriol from the working moms is on another level. Thinking sahms are worthless, don’t contribute to society, really? You have to have a deep sense of self hatred and raging jealousy to have such strong feelings about anyone else. [/quote]

Nope, sorry, but you have blinders on.  There is SO much vitriol from stay at home moms who accuse working moms of "abandoning their kids in daycares" and ask why they bothered to have kids at all.  You sound like a fool for blaming one group more than the other.  [/quote]

I have been on both sides and it’s definitely nastier from WOH, 100%. UMC circle though where you don’t get a lot of SAHMs that don’t use housekeeper or preschool, so there’s not much of the “letting other people raise your kids” narrative since most use some form of childcare themselves and see the merits of it. [/quote]

+ 1
I feel a rage in many WOH moms. It ranges from calling SAHMs worthless, submissive, anti-feminists, doormats to accusing them of "riding the gravy train".  There are dire predictions that their DH's will leave them for a working woman, thereby leaving the SAHM and her kids destitute.  Then on other forums they are crying about being devalued at work, being incompetent, having a boss from hell. They cry about hating their husband, sexual dysfunction, being attracted to others and husband cheating. They are unhappy about their messy homes or behaviour problems with their kids. THey are stressed out and bitchy when they have to function on the weekends in any social capacity. They are also very dismissive of other WOHMs - no sympathy for a new WOHM who is trying to pump or breastfeed at work for example.  They are dismissive of other WOHMs who don't make enough money to outsource chores, and they are absolutely nasty to the other WOHMs who are cleaning their homes or looking after their children.

It is just RAGE, RAGE, RAGE...

[/quote]

I agree. I’ve always wondered why they get so triggered.

Like the PP who said something about meeting her kids at the door every day. It’s been quoted several times. If you are secure in your choice to work, why do you care that she thinks it’s a luxury worth paying for (in forgone she become) to greet her kids at the door?

Really, why do you care? I want to know. And don’t give me any crap about setting a bad example for her kids because that is dumb. Kids grow into adults who do what they want to do.[/quote]

I wondered about this too. That came up several times and it seems like one of the more innocuous things a SAHM can say.

She literally said, I’ve been both but SAH is better for MY kids because xyz reasons. She wants to greet her kids at the door and take them to their activities. Who cares? What’s wrong with that? No grand pronouncements on how daycare is evil or working moms aren’t raising their kids.[/quote]

Wow, you guys are dense.  The issue isn't that she said working moms are bad.  The issue, as multiple people noted, is that having the MOM do all the stuff is what some people want to model for their children.  If that mom does, fine.  But that doesn't mean that others aren't allowed to have other opinions.  You're really twisting all the comments together and ignoring the fact that multiple people have commented in a single thread, so it's not like someone making a nasty comment somewhere down the line is saying the same thing as someone who commented upstream.[/quote]

Just curious, do you give overweight parents a hard time about the unhealthy diet and exercise habits they’re modeling for their kids? Or the moms who overdo it on nightly wine consumption? If the answer is no, then ask yourself why you feel it’s any of your business to weigh in on other women’s employment choices.[/quote]
+1 what a weird argument. My mom was SAHM my whole life and went back to work and eventually became a senior executive after I went to college. I never thought she was lazy or incapable of working. She took care of me and taught me to read and write; she was there for me after school and read books to me even as a teenager. She is very smart and I have a lot of respect for her. My DH and I decided early on that we did not want daycare for our children. It doesn’t make anyone else’s choices invalid. I’m not sure why all the hate in SAHMs here.[/quote]

Well you don’t sound very bright, so there’s that.[/quote]
Aw, you sound sad. I’m sure Bright Horizons loves your baby, don’t take it personally. :)[/quote]

And we are sure your husband thinks you’re smart and ambitious.  I’m sure you seem just as smart as the educated women he works with daily who spend time daily with working adults.  You appear just as smart and have plenty to talk about.  We promise!  [/quote]

Lol that you think that you’re smart because you work. [b]You’re just a cog in the wheel, entirely insignificant and wholly replaceable[/b]. OTOH, if you actually liked and spent more time with your family, your brow beaten husband might post less often on the relationship forum about how his mistress is so much hotter and nicer than his wife.[/quote]

Clearly I hit a nerve!!

This is every worker, including your husband.  Also you’re sexist unless you also criticize your husband for not spending time with his family because he’s employed.

Anyway - for the most part, a woman who works IS going to come across as smarter and more interesting.  Women who stay home have most of their network and activities revolving around their children.  Women who work are out and about with other adults completely unrelated to their family or children.  It’s a big world out there and most SAHMs have everything centered around their immediate family.  It’s less interesting and is myopic.  Dressing up and leaving your house most days to go and better yourself instead of just staying home and serving your family, makes you a more interesting person.

[/quote]

Lame response. I wouldn’t expect anything else from a drone though. Lmao that you agree that every worker is a cog in the wheel, yet dressing up(lol!) and going to work to your dispensable job is somehow bettering yourself. Today, we have knowledge about virtually everything at our fingertips and the freedom to work/learn/take care of household or a combination of these in any way we want. Your idea of a full life is what’s myopic and uninteresting.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics