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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I hope all the super smart posters here who are happy to save time by sending their child to an event without complying with the dress code are regularly deciding to wear crumpled tee shirts to the office rather than those high maintenance button down shirts. After all who has time to dry clean laundry or even fold it? Obviously all of you with your superior intellect have decided that is a task that doesn’t need to be done.

Or…is it only fine when your kid is the one who is embarrassed by sticking out like a sore thumb? [/quote]

Is little Cindy going to get fired from going to the old folks home if she wears a blue dress instead? Sounds like a pretty serious thing, and it would be totally smart to get divorced over it.[/quote]

No one is getting divorced over it. But my child would refuse to perform if they could not meet the mandatory dress code and I would not insist on it because *I* would not be comfortable wearing a pink shirt and patterned red leggings at an event where I was supposed to be wearing a dress dress and that’s the closest my daughter could come with what’s in her closet right now. My husband would understand that too. He would not think about any of this until way too late to do anything but he at least would not belittle me for helping my child be comfortable.

I notice that when these types of examples of “make work” they are never things that affect the person who has decided the task is unimportant. But they are perfectly happy to disappoint or let down their spouse or their kids.[/quote]

OK, and if little Cindy doesn't perform in that elementary school concert, the world will not end. Little Cindy might even still get into her first choice college! And maybe she'll even learn not to take things like this so seriously, and she'll have even more perspective on life than you, if you can imagine that.

So dramatic.[/quote]

Is that really the bar? Only things that prevent your kid from getting into college are worth doing? You are off the hook for everything else?

Just own up to it - you don’t care if your child is uncomfortable. It’s worth it to you so you don’t have to buy a dress OR feel a moment’s guilt over not buying one you can afford. [/quote]

I love that you interpreted that comment to be serious about college admissions. Uh, no, I don't think that it is good to worry about your elementary schooler's college admissions chances. I love that you think that that's normal though.

And you're right, I don't think it is a big deal to have a child not in dress code for an elementary school performance. I think close enough is fine. I think that by being laid back about it, your child will learn not to be uncomfortable about totally meaningless things like a dress code for an elementary school performance. And I know it's fine because my children are now older than that, have done really well in school, and are really laid back about silly details like that. If you want to raise your kids to be narcissistic and anxious, you're free to do that, but don't make it sound like it's mandatory or normal. Please get some perspective.

(Oh, and on the afford it point: you're right, I can afford it. But lots of parents can't, and they have to teach their kids not to be uncomfortable with it, and I bet those kids turn out better.)[/quote]

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