Reply to Millennials feel 'abandoned' by parents not available to help raise grandkids: 'Too busy'

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Reply to "Millennials feel 'abandoned' by parents not available to help raise grandkids: 'Too busy'"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My Boomer MIL watches our toddler three times a week and is an absolute gift.

My Boomer mother, who is five to six years older than my MIL still works to maintain her unnecessarily expensive lifestyle.

Both are minority immigrants.

I say this to say White Boomer parents aren’t the only ones not so willing to help out, spend time with grandkids, and indirectly build generational wealth by saving you yens of thousands on childcare. It really just depends on the person.[/quote]

Totally. For us it’s a mixed bag - like everything. Our parents are divorced and only one remarried so that makes things hard because we have three young kids and two dogs who routinely misbehave -and that’s a lot for anyone to handle alone, let alone someone who is 70+. My mom will occasionally help but she works FT and lives six hours away. She also easily gets overwhelmed and when she does she lashes out at whoever is around (so it would be my children) and then after freaking everyone out with her rage cries or pretends nothing happened. Additionally she’ll reference any time she helped with childcare when she gets upset at me. Something like “I looked after Larla on that overnight” - even if it was four years ago when she looked after one child for nine hours by herself she’ll never let me forget. My father is not an option - he thinks he’s good with kids but my kids are scared of him because he’s old and rigid and not talkative. My husband’s parents either ply the kids with candy or can’t walk, so equally fraught. [/quote]

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