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[quote=Anonymous]I wonder when this mother and baby are going home.

I can relate to this situation from both sides of the family.  My own mom is a very stressful person to have in my house.  We aren't estranged but I need firm boundaries.  If she had lived close enough to visit the day after birth, I would have invited her to the hospital, because the very last thing I would have wanted when I was bleeding, and trying to establish nursing, and coping with a toddler adjusting to siblinghood, was her to come in my house, where she would have inevitably told me that I was being lazy, or doing something wrong, or a terrible parent, or my older child was a brat, or my younger child (the 1 day old) was spoiled.

I was lucky that she lived far enough away that she didn't come till the baptism, but if she'd been close, I would have wanted her at the hospital so I didn't feel obligated to invite her in my house.  This would mean that "she can just come the next day" didn't apply.

On DH's side, I have the sibling who is always jealous.  My SIL can get jealous over insane things.  She gets jealous over things I can not change, like how tall my kids are, and jealous things that only someone who was nuts would be upset about.  That doesn't mean that she doesn't also sometimes make reasonable requests, like asking someone to visit her at the hospital when she had a new baby.  In my experience, I need to treat those few reasonable requests like reasonable requests, not responding irrationally to them.  [/quote]

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