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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I understand what you guys are saying re: not officially having access to a husband’s 401k. But come on, [b]truly, what are the odds that my living, still married husband with whom I have an amazing open trusting relationship (which includes full transparency with all our finances) is someday going to deny me access to his 401k money?[/b] Are those odds big enough that they warrant me missing out on a few years of staying home with my children, if that’s what I want to do? For me, that risk is not big enough.  And to be honest, there is very little that could happen to me in the future that would make me regret spending this time with my children. But I understand how that calculation is different for other people. And also, as I said, I do have my own retirement accounts from when I was working.[/quote]

The odds are actually fairly high.[/quote]

I don't know if I would say high, but I'm divorced and know a lot of other divorced women. There's a really common story that goes: I thought even if we split up he would be decent to me, but he cut off my access to funds during our divorce, I don't have money to pay a lawyer, the harder I fight for my half the more vindictive he gets and I'm afraid that if I push he'll try to get primary access of the kids. If you go into a divorce with no resources things can get really bad. My mom, happily married for 55 years, always told me to make sure I have my own money and I take that advice.[/quote]

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