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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I love how some clown keeps harping that the issue is lack of sex yet never admits that’s driven by broken trust, reliability and respect.

It’s like saying you are shocked you have a cavity yet constantly eat krap and don’t brush your teeth. Is the real issue the cavity or your bad habits?

Delulu. [/quote]

And never addresses the role that communication plays in all of it.  If a spouse is unhappy, they need to say so.  Don’t assume the other person is a mind reader, however obvious it might be.  Have a serious sit-down discussion before the resentment builds to the point of no return.  Before one party has already fully checked out.  It doesn’t mean divorce isn’t 100% going to be prevent, but it will prevent the other feeling blindsided if it actually comes to that.

Oh, can’t/don’t wanna have a discussion with your spouse?  See above post.

[/quote]

There are literally constantly posts here in various threads by women in their 40s and 50s who have lost interest in sex entirely, yet don't see it as a problem at all-- in fact it's their absolute right not only to not have marital sex but to be outraged that their husbands feel differently about it.  Op sounds like one of them.[/quote] I realized post-separation that I had not lost interest in sex at all. Just sex with the ex. And fwiw in our sexless marriage my ex never once addressed it or asked for sex. I certainly wasn't interested in him so was happy to not address it if he wasn't going to address it. How does that fit the narrative of some of you that it's always the woman's fault when there were actually two people who didn't want to have sex with each other?....[/quote]. Was your ex a closeted gay?[/quote] tbh I wondered once in a while but he did leave to be with a woman. He has deep, deep issues with shame and rage. We were both raised Catholic but he was raised by Bible thumpers and a mom who prayed all the time. My Catholic upbringing was very different - it was more cultural and my parents (and my Catholic schools) never presented the idea of a vengeful God. So who knows. Homeboy ought to do some work on himself to examine the roots of his rage but he won't. To make a short story long, I think he is so repressed that he would never be able to open that closet door.[/quote]

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