Reply to How do you stay married to an ASD HFA Aspergers husband?

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[quote=Anonymous]My spouses diagnoses was a big A ha moment for our whole family and extended family.

We were told to read up on it, get an experienced therapist specializing in autism, have them try Hypnotherapy, exercise, cut out coffee and sodas, and continue on lexapro for anger and anxiety outbursts. The theory there was anxiety caused the lashing out and temper tantrums.

Everyone did their reading and individual and some group therapy except the ASD I spouse. They did some therapy but wouldn’t put in the time to learn new habits. I myself had to change therapists $4000 in since my wasn’t coming up with coping methods, they just implied divorce was the best option. I explored that with several lawyer consults and ultimately think the children would be worse off, however many experts believed the ASD I spouse would eventually drift to every other weekend and convenient dinner dates with the kids. Doing the day to day or managing a custody schedule would overwhelm them and they could be their Best Self if it was in smaller spurts like a weekend of stuff or a dinner after their activities.

So we are ready to go down that route if things get bad in the household again. They pretty much ignore me and the kids and all emails and schedules. They prefer to constantly ask What’s going on today, if they feel they have some time and energy.

Definitely not a life partner or active spouse, parent or homeowner. Very reactionary if any reaction happens, and can handle small tasks if mentally available. [/quote]

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