Reply to How many women here divorced primarily due to imbalanced, unsustainable home workload?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Adding a childfree couple perspective - we both make about the same, but I have the more demanding (time and stresswise) job - I go in to the office every day and he is still WFH. Although we have a lot less to handle (no kid stuff), the bulk of the household labor and mental load still falls on me. He either doesn't 'see' stuff, half-asses it (intentionally?) or assumes things will work out so does not anticipate and preempt things (he characterizes this as being an optimist, but I think it's often just laziness).

He's a decent guy and will do better for a while when I point out the imbalance to him, but quickly slides back into letting me handle it.

I think PP who likened this to frogs in a pot was spot-on. We got married in grad school when we were basically living like monks with very little to do besides focus on our degrees. But as life got complicated I gradually took on more and more that he was not stepping up to handle.

I still see us as being married for life and in a cold assessment I am still personally better off being married to him than leaving. But I have basically given in to a low-grade resentment and I have no idea whether it's even worth it or possible to fix at this point. [/quote]

Imagine if you did have kids, or what about eldercare? Yes, it's low grade or higher resentment.[/quote]

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