Reply to Son only cousin excluded from nephew's wedding

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If there is a no kids wedding, adding one 9 year old that people wonder about causes more hassle than never seeing OP and their $$$ again. [/quote]

How do they know she's going to be so vindictive? It wasn't a decision that was personal to her. They invited her to come and would probably be happy to see her believing they have a close relationship. It doesn't mean they don't like her son. His not going doesn't mean he won't be close with cousins. All of this is just made up narrative to fuel anger. [/quote]

Yeah, no.

It’s perfectly fine for the couple to have a no kids wedding. However, they can’t expect attendance or huge cash gifts from relatives with kids.

The aunt isn’t vindictive because she won’t attend or send a bucket of cash. A nice $200 gift is all that good manners requires. [/quote]

The aunt isn’t vindictive because she won’t send a bucket of cash — she’s vindictive because she felt compelled to say how much more she would have spent if the wedding plans had been as she wished. She could have left that part out, but she chose not to. [/quote]

Eh whatever- no one has to know.  Paying for college doesn't necessarily mean you will get a similar sized wedding gift anyway and if nephew expects that, that is his problem.  A few hundred dollars and a nice card is perfectly fine.

I agree with the suggestion to reach out to nephew personally saying why you can't attend.  No asking for favors or anything, but if you are that close to him surely you can be upfront that you simply don't have viable childcare options for your 9yo and won't be able to attend.[/quote]

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