Reply to I’m 20w pregnant. My fiance told me he has herpes.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP I feel for you. You are getting both extremes on here.

No one should lie about their STI status.

But herpes tests ARE confusing.

I went through this with my husband when we were first dating - disclosing what we had been tested for and when and then got updated tests. This came up. He thought he didn’t have it but when I looked at the paper it was within the range identified as present. His doctor also states something about blood tests not being conclusive and registering antibodies. Albeit this was 20 years ago.

In the end I talked to my own doctor and got comfortable with it. My husband has never had an outbreak. I’ve never had an outbreak or tested positive. And lord knows I’ve lived through enough stress to bring out something latent! I honestly don’t even think I remembered it during my 2 pregnancies but presumably they tested for it??? Maybe I mentioned it to my OB and it wasn’t a concern.

All to say - there is a spectrum here of people who have “positive tests” but never seem to actually have outbreaks/spread the disease, and people whose lives are very very impacted by it.

The reality is: unless you are speaking with every partner and putting eyes on their current test results yourself, you’ve probably slept with someone who has this same status. They probably wouldn’t even know it unless they tested for it, which most people do not do as a matter of routine.  Going in for testing bc of an active outbreak is a different situation. [/quote]

In the last 5 years I have been tested 3x. I paid out of pocket for a full panel that included both HSV types. My results were very clearly negative and I required the same testing for the 3 partners I had in that span of time before I would sleep with them. 2 had negative on both and one had positive for HSV-1. Which I didn’t care as much about-He did say he had gotten a cold sore a couple of times. He never had anything while we were together and I waited 6 months after that relationship ended and was tested again, negative.

I guess maybe I don’t understand what’s confusing about the tests when mine and the others I saw all clearly showed negative or positive. There was no confusion. [/quote]

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