Reply to What I’m noticing from millennial high achieving moms

Forum Index » General Parenting Discussion

Reply to "What I’m noticing from millennial high achieving moms"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm not even going to bother reading the 24 pages of idiocy this post has prompted.

- Young Gen X Mom who thinks OP is stupid.[/quote]

I’m with you! It takes a few years to figure out how exhausting 3+ kids can be. By the time mom decides to SAH, the couple realizes how expensive 3+ kids can be esp to educate, save for retirement, take care of parents who are getting dementia. But you do you 30-somethings. [/quote]

I find it shocking that people have a third (or fourth or fifth) kid without realizing this. How???? Especially if you are well-educated and in your late 20s or early 30s by the time you start having kids.

I have friends with 3 who have acted surprised about every feature of their family size since the third was born. They were shocked at how expensive 4-5 bedroom houses are. They were shocked when their nanny expected more money for adding an infant to her workload. They were shocked when their food bill went up, when their eldest became jealous of the baby and started acting out, when their vacations became pricier and unwieldy due to the age spread.

I am empathetic -- it does in fact sound very hard. But I can't help wondering why on earth none of this occurred to them before? How can this be a surprise? I don't get it. This is precisely why we didn't have a third kid. We discussed it, we love kids and there are things about it that were very appealing, but the practicalities are just stacked against you.

I'm not against 3 or more kids (I am one of four, my sister has four) but I don't understand how it happens and then people realize "oh, this is harder and more expensive than having two, why didn't anyone tell me????" Uh, we thought you knew! It seems really obvious.[/quote]

Newsflash, lady: they were not actually shocked - they were just venting.[/quote]

No, I agree that I don't think people with 3+ kids really thought it through, they just wanted more babies but then didn't think about logistics. Have 3+ kids? You'll need 2 hotel rooms or have to pay extra for a cot or make your kids sleep 3 to a bed and they will hate you forever for that. Have 3+ kids? You'll need a bigger car that fits 6+ people in case you need to bring a friend along somewhere. Have 3+ kids? One of them will always feel excluded if it's an odd number.

How do people not think this through???[/quote]

Oh, well if YOU agree that must mean it’s gospel  :roll: [/quote]

You don’t need a car that fits 6. And there are plenty of families with only two children where the children dislike each other. And if you have a boy and a girl it’s only a matter of time before you need to figure out something different with hotels since it’s weird to force them to share a bed past a certain age. There are plenty of problems every family has to contend with…Insert Anna Karenina reference regarding unhappy families. [/quote]

If your kids outgrow sharing a bed, you just divide them and each share a bed with a parent. Or you get a room with two beds and a pullout couch. It's not that hard.

Not all families are unhappy. [/quote]

No on his saying all families are unhappy. One person noted that they know some families that always seem surprised by thing they didn't think through. I know one like that too. No need for moms of 3+ kids to get defensive when people are just making observations. My parents had 3 kids, it really was sometimes a logistical nightmare. It's one of the primary reasons I only had two children (as did my siblings). [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics