Reply to Raising kids in a competitive UMC community? Would you do it all over again?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Interesting thread.

We live in Mclean, and we've thought about moving to other areas (ski town in the Rockies, mostly) but I feel strongly that raising kids in a competitive, driven environment is important. The world is a competitive place, I want my kids to be successful and have an impact, and here they are exposed to so many successful and competitive people. I think it's a good thing. If you surround yourself with high-achievers you are more likely to achieve, right?[/quote]

or think of yourself as a low achiever even though you are doing your best.[/quote]

This. Growing up in an environment where "achievement" is most valued (as opposed to family, personal fulfillment, balance, happiness, charity) breeds insecurity. If what matters most is winning, most people will be failures.

Whereas if what matters most is creating a fulfilling and meaningful life, thus is possible for anyone, and there is also no time limit.[/quote]

You can value achievement and still value family and happiness even more. For a good example,  look at Nigerian American families and see how close they are to their families and how supportive they are of their families. Then take a look at how proud they are of their educational, professional and other achievements.
[/quote]

Have you ever met an Indian? They are also very family and achievement oriented.[/quote]

Indian very cocky though [/quote]

haha so are nigerians!

I'm half Indian/pakistani 2nd generation but our families can be a source of stress and competition more than a support or comfort. maybe I feel like this b/c my family was one of the early well settled ones who helped everyone else out but we get ZERO support or appreciation, nothing but expectations put on us.  its VERY annoying and South asians are very very materialistic, toxic levels and and mostly ive seen that we are not very civic minded. I dont think looking at high wealth & success immigration communities is the way to go- b/c that is a self selecting group of people who loves money and success more than anything else- they will forego seeing their parents for 20,30 years to make money and both parents and kids are ok with this, its an acceptable price! More mixed income immigrant communities like Cubans or Italians or Filipino are better examples. [/quote]

It does feel like Indians and Persians are very competitive with one another and their friends and families. They take sibling rivalry and competitiveness to another level.[/quote]

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