Reply to Stop asking student tour guides where they're applying to college

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]There was a great article in the NYTimes about how normal stressors are viewed by today's teens as a serious mental health issues. Like instead of saying I feel very nervous about standing up in front of class to give my presentation, they think they have a social anxiety disorder. Every one of us was asked awkward questions when we were teens and we learned how to brush them off. They were more likely to be "why don't you have a boyfriend?" from my elderly aunt for me in the 1980s but we need to teach our teens how to have lots of different social interactions without becoming unglued.[/quote]

You all keep missing the point.  The point isn't whether kids can answer awkward questions. The point is a PSA to adults to get them up to speed on the fact that this is no longer an appropriate small talk topic, no longer simple question.  College admissions has changed so much in the last 4 years...it was already stressful before that.[/quote]

I get the point and I never ask this question myself. But life is filled with awkward questions and you are missing the point that we need to teach our teenagers how to handle themselves in uncomfortable situations, particularly when they have to interact with people of a different generation or from a different culture. I know that some people wish we could curate settings with nothing but easy social interactions for our kids but that's not likely going to be how the rest of their lives work. And if the worst most stressful thing that your 17 has to deal with is someone asking about their college applications they are extraordinarily fortunate.[/quote]

But can't you see that a PSA to adults can co-exist with teaching our children resilience? My kids are resilient. They can - and do - handle these questions and they deal with much more difficult issues. So do I. It's not about putting bubble wrap around them for protection. They are fine. It's about giving an FYI to others who don't realize the current landscape.

Another example using all adults, it's like asking someone who has just one child (or even no children) when they are having another or why they only have one.  It's pretty insensitive and intrusive. Many of these women would love to have more but can't or have had multiple miscarriages. You just don't go there.  (But most of the time - when people "do" go there - the woman just deals with it - hopefully the questioner is naive or old. Sometimes, they are just being rude.)      [/quote]

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