Reply to Would you get an amnio? Ambiguous genitalia at 20 week US

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I'm so glad to hear from you and thank you for keeping this thread updated.

Have you and your family come up with ways to handle other people commenting on your child's ambiguous sex/gender? I would imagine that it would be handled differently with people who your family is close to vs. with strangers, but for example, what is your childcare plan? How will you discuss this issue with, say, a nanny or daycare provider?[/quote]

Well, at this stage the ambiguity isn't obvious to anyone unless they're literally changing the baby's diaper (which for now is just family), or if they ask us boy or girl. For family/close friends, they've been in the loop on the situation from the beginning so there's not much to explain. For any childcare provider, we'd explain the situation to them fully since they'll be changing diapers and such, but that's a problem for down the road since I'll be on maternity leave for a while and the gender question may well be settled before there's a nanny or day care in the picture (settled in terms of sex of rearing, not "settled" like we're going to make any physical changes to the baby, to be clear). The one category of people who've been somewhat in the loop but not fully briefed are work people - e.g. our bosses, colleagues, etc., who've interacted with us all along the way and may've noticed the change from "it's a girl" (pre-20 week ultrasound) to "we don't know yet," and have now asked boy or girl since the baby has been born. These are the folks we've just told we still don't know yet, and just said briefly that the gender situation is fluid or, for those we're more comfortable with, that the baby was born with an intersex condition, here are their pronouns, and they're healthy and doing great.

If people assume one gender right now, we generally don't correct them (because (1) what would we even correct them to, and (2) we may end up needing to correct them again once things are clearer). All told our approach is pretty ad hoc, but feels like the best we can do right now. [/quote]

PP here.

Your approach doesn't sound ad hoc at all. It sounds like your approach is evolving with additional information and situation-dependent based on need. I completely and totally respect that and wish you and your family nothing but joy.[/quote]

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