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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
Sorry that happened to your kid's friend - that is shitty. As a thought experiment, what if your kid's friend had been Asian or Hispanic. Would the driver had left? I think not. So is it accurate to label it "white privilege"? The problem is not that the driver would pick up your kid or his/her Asian friend but that the driver would not pickup a black child. That is the shitty thing we need to fix. Calling it "white privilege" is generally unhelpful, inaccurate, and alienates people of goodwill. 
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As a white person, there are literally a thousand daily worries that I don't have to deal with because of my race.  I also don't have to worry that my young son will be perceived by members of the majority culture as, on average 4 years older than he is.  I also don't have to worry that my preschooler is three times as likely to be suspended as his classmates for the exact same discipline issues (https://www2.ed.gov/about/offices/list/ocr/docs/crdc-discipline-snapshot.pdf).  If my kid was convicted of a crime, I don't have to worry that he would be 18 times as likely as a white kid to be sentenced as an adult (http://www.apa.org/pubs/journals/releases/psp-a0035663.pdf).  When I'm shopping for a home, I don't have to worry about being routinely guided to sub-prime loans regardless of my income (http://www.demos.org/blog/new-hud-report-shows-continued-discrimination-against-people-color).  Unlike black people, I'm not 30% more likely to be pulled over by police (https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/wonk/wp/2014/09/09/you-really-can-get-pulled-over-for-driving-while-black-federal-statistics-show/).   I also don't have to worry about being killed while crossing the street at a crosswalk because white drivers simply refuse to stop for people of my race (https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/dr-gridlock/wp/2015/10/26/walking-while-black-can-be-deadly-too-study-finds/).  Denying that life is easier for white people (and to a lesser extent for Asians and Latinos) is unhelpful, inaccurate, and alienates people of goodwill.

The need that I sometimes feel to try to explain away statistics like those above or to try to explain away experiences like the Uber experience you commented on is what I mean when I say "white fragility." I can't look into your heart and know what you are thinking, but I can see that discomfort and defensiveness in myself (and, as a man,  similar defensiveness that I feel in the face of some MeToo discussions) and name it, and I think that's useful.  I'm not aware of white fragility being used in any of the communications about HFA at Wilson (or anywhere in this discussion, until you combed the consultant's Web site to find that term), so I'm not sure how it's being used to shut down discussion.
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You did not answer my question. In fact, you seem to have gone way out your way not to answer it. And your emotional need to attach an inflammatory name ("white fragility") to the banal notion that people get defensive does not speak well of you.

I asked you before to "please be more careful with your accusations". You clearly ignored that reasonable request. First, I did not "to try to explain away experiences like the Uber experience" which I specifically described as a "shitty" thing to happen to a kid. I simply tried to dig deeper into the issue using a "thought experiment" so that we could properly characterize it. Somehow this went over your head. Second, you accused me of "denying that life is easier for white people" which I never did. In fact, I explicitly stated that "I don't deny racism or its history." Of course life is easier when, for example, you are discriminated against less often as in the case with white people. Duh!

And finally, the principal of Wilson HS herself used the term "white fragility" as part of her discussion of implementing HFA. She used and embraced the term, not me. [/quote]

It might actually be helpful to understand where the term "white fragility" comes from. Also PP your responses, defensiveness and belief that your view is the only view that is right are actually some of the hallmarks of "white fragility".  The question race is really important at Wilson - the school has major racial issues that just lie underneath the surface there. All of the kids are aware of it - so it is an important conversation in the context of HFA.  It is dangerous for white parents to keep spreading the narrative that kids of color can't do the work. It is dangerous for your kids and society as a whole.  Wilson is a diverse school but it is not inclusive and that is a worthwhile issue to try and address.

And for any white people that are willing to learn more about "white fragility" here is a talk the author of the book did and personally I found it to be instructive. And BTW her message is for white progressives.  I think it would be hard for many white people to get through, but I'll post it anyway:

Robin Di Angelo author of White Fragility
 [youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=45ey4jgoxeU[/youtube]
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