Reply to Am I the only one who doesn't feel bored as a stay at home mom?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I just don't feel comfortable knowing that my life is made entirely possible by someone else's largesse.  I've always felt this way, even as a child when I realized some moms don't work outside the home.  It's an uncomfortable feeling.  [/quote]

I've been married 30 years and have been at home all but about six of them.  DH and I are both 50. I feel 100% comfortable knowing my life is made entirely possible by my DH's income.  He would tell you that his life is made 100% possible by me managing our home.  So it works out well in our family.

But if it gives you an uncomfortable feeling, you should definitely continue working.[/quote]

Fantastic answer and 100% true.  I worked for 11 years and have been fortunate enough to be home for 12.  I just laugh at the simpletons who can't grasp that marriage is a team effort, not an exercise in bean counting.  My husband is my biggest champion, and I am his - no matter which way our "division of duties" is divvied up.  [/quote]

MY marriage is not a team effort, it's an exercise in bean counting, which is why we both work full time. Not ideal, but yeah, it is, so neither of us would ever let the other SAH. In fact, we both make roughly the same amount (in 2016, I made 55% of the HHI).[/quote]

That is pretty pathetic that you even admit yours is a marriage based on bean counting.  And that neither of you would "ever let the other SAH."  Wow.  How awful, to compete not only at work, but also in your marriage.  Sad for your kids, too.[/quote]

At least I'm not in denial.  Many SAHMs think they are equal partners, when really, their husbands pick the vacation destination or the next car, and let their wives worry about the details.  What can a SAHM do if her husband decides to stay for a couple of days of vacation after a business trip?[/quote]

Huh.  Sounds like you're projecting your own (very peculiar) marital dynamic onto others who have no idea what you're talking about.  Talk about denial!   :lol:

My entire family decides where to go on vacation, and I plan all the details because I enjoy it - and I have time to do so.  Cars?  How strange that you'd think our husbands decide what we'll drive.   :shock:

As for vacations, my husband and I plan a few trips together each year around his business trips - so of course he's going to extend his vacation days so we can do this.  Often, the whole family will come along, if his trip coincides with a school break.  He would laugh at the suggestion that when he travels alone, he's going to "decide to stay for a couple of days," rather than come home.  The last thing he wants is to extend a business trip, unless it's part of a vacation.

What your post is really saying is that this is what you *imagine* must occur in a marriage with a SAHP.  In other words, wishful thinking on your part.  Sorry to disappoint! [/quote]

No, these two scenarios were described to me by two of my SAHM friends. I'm glad your marriage is so very equal.[/quote]

You guys pick bad spouses. [/quote]

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