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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]it’s a lie the class obsessed tell themselves to soothe their feelings of inadequacy. [/quote]

Well, it's how UMC can become wealthy. For those who truly make a ton of money or inherited it, they don't need to do this.

We make $400k in the DC suburbs. We have a smaller SFH in a good neighborhood with excellent public schools. We drive our cars for 10+ years and buy a standard Toyota/Honda. If we had upgraded the house, cars, and/or paid for private schools, we would not be saving nearly as much and would just be working each month to pay for our expenses. Being frugal has been a game changer - you can't make it up on Starbucks and homemade lunches. It's because our monthly expenses are $5000+ lower than they could be, and we are investing all of that and have been for years. [/quote]

100 percent this. We have a $2000/month mortgage and no car payment and are able to fuel that extra money into the market and just see it grow, which gives us room to fund things that we actually want and to feel a deep sense of security.

Years of reading "FIRE" blogs like Mr. Money Mustache also really sunk in after a while, though we are not FIRE people necessarily. But the main points he makes -- using money to buy freedom rather than things, and only spend your money and objects that actually increase your happiness or make your life easier. And, live somewhere where you are not car dependent.

[/quote]
What year did you buy your home in?[/quote]

Here we go again. “I have to be broke! I had no choice but to take out an $8k/month mortgage! It’s all someone else’s fault, of course never mine.”[/quote]

NP-It's a valid question. I personally bought my home when I could pay a low cost for it, so I have a low mortgage. The same home (boring 90s home in a burb with good public schools) and similar homes are now going for over twice what we paid. Timing plays a huge part and it's not about "having to be broke" but just the sorts of reasonable, frugal choices you can make. Your choices and mine were really easy.[/quote]

Speak for yourself. My choices were not easy at all. Getting my boring SFH in the exurbs still required a lot of frugality and some other stops on the property ladder. And it STILL isn’t renovated all these years later, just new paint and lights and live with the rest. Most of these whiners wouldn’t even buy the house I live in. Boohoo for them![/quote]

Agree. I grew up with financial insecurity, so becoming financially independent was huge for me. I may work until I'm in my 50s, 60s, or 70s, but I have no stress if that isn't the case. Buying cheaper cars/houses etc made that possible. If I valued these material things, perhaps I would be committed to working later, no questions, and buying these larger ticket items. Seems stressful to me but again, my perspective is shaped by my childhood. [/quote]

You are both missing the point. These choices are no longer possible: My 1k car that run great, 400k home with good schools in a safe area...Those choices are gone. Sure, young people can try and make frugal choices, but a frugal used car is now 18k, a home is 850k on my street if you get lucky and not outbid by cash offers. And yes, I get it, you have peers your age who overextended on mortgages and bought 60k cars and you made better decisions than them. That is not what I was talking about: I'm talking about people like you with your good frugal sense, just 30+ years later.[/quote]

I do get it, but the conversation wasn't really focused on young adults now. Even now it comes down to starting to save early AND getting lucky - get a job out of college with no student loans (both easier said than done), get roommates even if you can afford your own place so you can save for retirement, meet and marry a smart partner who also has good earning potential and who has simple wants, make friends who don't hemorrhage money in their social activities and aren't showy.

That's not helpful for someone 40 and trying to figure it out now. But tell your kids! And also, be prepared to help them in young adulthood if you can. 10 years ago, I used to think kids should be fully independent and make it on their own, but no more. I will do all I can to help them - pay for college, contribute to their ROTH IRA, etc. etc. Because as you said, it's not as easy as it used to be, but even then many people weren't saving as they could. It is very sad but that's where we are. [/quote]

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